28 April 2012

Marlene Dietrich Makeup Tutorials

Getting dolled up on the Destry Rides Again set
You may move like Jagger, but are you getting dolled up like Dietrich? We've seen Marlene primping in several of her movies--The Blue Angel, Dishonored, Blonde Venus, Destry Rides Again, and Manpower coming to mind. Maria Riva shares lots of Dietrich's cosmetic tricks in her book as well.

Nowadays, YouTube makeup gurus are teaching their acolytes how to look like Our Lady of the False Eyelashes, but these YouTubers never refer to Dietrich's movies or Maria. Instead of following Marlene's techniques, they devise their own ways to emulate her, which makes perfect sense. No longer must you spit in your mascara pot, and if you do, please stop! With updated methods, these gurus ought to do Dietrich justice, but that's no easy feat without her lighting and genes.

Among these videos, I see some false prophets and some messiahs, but I prefer to ask what you think. Which of these videos get Marlene Dietrich's look right? Which go horribly awry?


(1)


(2)


(3)


(4)

16 comments:

  1. Anonymous29 April, 2012 02:12

    The marlene look as you say it takes not only makeup, false eyelashes but in the genes. These transformations are like little creepy, and the girls that take place are scary. Please, no more horror films, jejeje

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  2. The Lady Eve29 April, 2012 10:46

    My reactions: #1 knows exactly what she's doing, has the Dietrich look down cold. Would love her to have done my makeup a couple of decades ago. The rest, YIKES! #2 created more of a Barbara Nichols look, not that there's much demand for that...and #s 3 and 4, poor dears...

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  3. Joseph29 April, 2012 11:10

    Hahaha! Miguel, I should have titled this post Le cauchemar dans Avenue Montaigne. I didn't mean to scare you!

    Lady Eve, I liked #1 as well. She doesn't look like Dietrich at all but recreates the Shanghai Express look--even with the hair pulled to the side. I can't stop laughing about your comments about the others, especially #2. I saw she did a Madonna tutorial and screwed that one up, too. The only saving grace was that she already looks like Madonna--particularly with the gap in her 2 front teeth.

    Another young lady made a Dietrich makeup tutorial that gave me comic relief for a long time, but she unfortunately removed it. You can all, however, imagine its greatness by watching her Bette Davis tutorial!

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    1. The Lady Eve29 April, 2012 12:59

      I felt the same way about #1, she didn't resemble Dietrich but understood the essence of the look and style so well that she was able to capture it with great skill. I checked out the Bette Davis tutorial. All I could think was that if the girl had donned a doll wig and powdered her face white she MIGHT have looked the tiniest bit like Baby Jane.

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    2. Joseph29 April, 2012 15:58

      Don't be surprised if the cops come knocking at your door because you killed me with that comment! Someone should really write a letter to her daddy, saying, "Confiscate her webcam!"

      It's a crying shame she deleted her Dietrich tutorial because--at the end of it--I was waiting for her to pull her hair back and ask, "Wanna kiss me, ducky?"

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  4. Anonymous30 April, 2012 01:26

    Dear oh dear,its a shame Maria Ouspenskya isn't still around,she could have captured the Dietrich look perfectly.The word deluded comes to mind.Paul

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    1. Joseph30 April, 2012 13:53

      Oh, I'm sure a few of YouTube's makeup mavens could recreate Maria's look so well, they'd have you thinking she is still around. In fact, they could probably do a mean Margaret Hamilton, too, and they wouldn't even need makeup!

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  5. theprovocateur01 May, 2012 05:04

    First one is really good, but no wonder- Sam Champan is a great make-up artist.
    However, the other videos... As Lady Eve has said, "poor dears"... ;)

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  6. umaneo01 May, 2012 05:46

    I have to agree with everyone that the first one is best, really pretty. There are some other 'tutorials' massacring MM and Edie Sedgwick too. I suppose it's a kind of compliment...

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  7. Joseph01 May, 2012 12:44

    Ewa, she does a great job, indeed. I was wondering whether viewers could even replicate her looks, but I did notice that the pixiwoo website is organized like a recipe book so that non-professionals can practice the basics before they try the more complicated techniques.

    Umaneo, I prefer the massacres! Even though this woman isn't paying tribute to any stars, her video must be the Wonderland murders of makeup tutorials. Wait a minute--maybe I wrote too soon.

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    1. umaneo01 May, 2012 20:12

      Oh dear God, Joseph!! I clicked on the links...my eyes! First Big Ange, now this!!

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    2. Joseph02 May, 2012 00:52

      Umaneo, I think the constellations glimmering on the first guru's face are what are blinding you. I figured you didn't need a star-inspired tutorial when you could gaze directly at Canis Major.

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    3. Anonymous02 May, 2012 10:57

      Hey, but that has nothing to do with our dear Marlene. Marlene must be turning in her grave, hahaha. Please more glamour... It's a joke, sorry. Funny comments.

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    4. Joseph02 May, 2012 12:40

      Miguel, surely you can't expect me to find anyone more glamorous than these ladies, who must be the reincarnations of Grace Kelly and Ava Gardner! Our starry-eyed guru even has Fergie's "Glamorous" playing in the background.

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  8. Anonymous04 May, 2012 08:55

    Non of them come even close ! Because they don't have the high forehead , heavy eyelids or cheekbones . Not to mention the big flat nose .
    But the first girl is quite good , she knows how to put on a " vampish " look .

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    1. Joseph04 May, 2012 09:42

      Amen. Marlene Dietrich was more than mere cosmetics, and if you don't share her features, you really won't succeed in looking like her.

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